Debra Reicher, PhD, a clinical child and adolescent psychologist at the Stony Brook Medicine, provides 11 practical tips to parents to help manage the anxiety felt by children about COVID-19.
- Use a calm and reassuring tone. Your child will be looking to you to gauge their own responses and they are sensitive to your words and non-verbal communication. Do what you need to take care of your own needs including adequate sleep, nutrition and exercise.
- Find out what they already know about the virus. This serves as a starting point so that you provide accurate information, correct inaccurate ideas, and gain a general understanding of where they are coming from. This also helps avoid providing too much information.
- Don’t be afraid to talk about it. Kids will pick up on this. Avoiding the topic or silence is likely to increase anxiety.
- Provide simple and age appropriate information. Tell them what COVID-19 is, what happens if someone gets it and what we can do to decrease the likelihood of getting it.
- Provide a daily time to listen to worries. This may help to contain the anxiety to a specific portion of the day. Empathize and validate your child frequently by stating that their feelings are understandable and reasonable.
- Identify your child’s greatest specific worries related to COVID-19. Some children will worry about illness, others about prom and socializing and others about grades. Empathize with what the perceived impact is and problem solve together in an effort to mitigate. For example, if health is a concern, provide details on hand- washing and social distancing. And if social issues are a concern, identify safe ways your child can interact such as through face time.
- Limit the amount of time and exposure your child has to the news and media. Avoid having the news on for the entire day. Be aware of the information your child has access to so that you can help them process it.
- Keep a routine. Have household activities take place around the three meals of the day. Make time for exercise. Do the best you can with schoolwork. Try to keep wake time and bedtime reasonable.
- Help your child tolerate uncertainty. Uncertainty is likely to create anxiety. Normalize the experience by suggesting that most of us are feeling anxious with the uncertainty of the current situation
- Help your child learn that they have the tools to cope with anxiety. Allow them to express feelings and provide appropriate emotion labels if your child has difficulty doing so. The metaphor of a wave or riding a bike uphill may be helpful to illustrate that anxiety peaks and then fades. Practice mindfulness or relaxation strategies with your child.
- Share My Story about Pandemics and the Coronavirus. This excellent social story by Carol Gray, Director of the Gray Center for Social Learning and Understanding, is a great resource for older children as well as adults.